slashing prices!!!

...Summer is here and what better time to pick up a long board, and one on sale for that matter. Since we will no longer be carrying Harbour or Dewey Weber because of their decisions to "go plastic" we're passing the savings on to you. Cheers!

the next movement...

...someone "dueced" next to the shower at the Washout over the weekend, about 20 yards from the port-o-loo. Let's band together and stop this before we're knee deep in...

excessive...

...so you place an order for 60 rash guards. Out of those 60, all but 4 are back-ordered. The environmentally sound company would contact the buyer, by email or phone, and maybe suggest holding those 4 rash guards back from shipping until the rest were ready. This would save paper, plastic, petrol (for shipping) and other miscellaneous waste. But this is the surf industry. 4 rash guards (that would have fit in a manila envelope) shared the cross-country trip in this 6x8x12 box with 4 pieces of paper(could have been 1), enough plastic to shrink wrap an average sized human and some sheet of cardboard. If you can't read the company name on the packing list I'll name some team riders for you: Cory Lopez, Tim Reyes, Jon Jon Florence, Sage Erickson, Rochelle Ballard...

Some, instead of none, of this trash will end up in the ocean.

have happy surf...

...these shark teeth were all found on Folly Beach during the last sand renourishment project. The ancestors of these sharks are...oh, I don't know... swimming around you while you surf. Have happy surf this weekend!

one sequel too many???

...not a chance. As the Speed Demon 2 got back to its fuller roots, some of us were left wondering what to ride when the surf got good. Wasn't too psyched on the Psycho Ward, Whiplash was a little too curvy for Folly. So the Speed Demon 3 came onto the scene, reminiscent of the old Archy model from T. Patterson, but with Matt Biolos' updates and touch. A slightly more fine tuned rocker, bottom and outline than the Speed Demon 2, but with an added Vee deck to a thin, boxy rail. Pulled double-wing swallow gives the board the turning capabilities of a narrow pin tail, but enough width for drive through flat sections. Grip it and rip it.

quaded...

...Channel Islands has updated their ever popular Flyer model with 4 fins and honestly, it looks better than any other Flyer I've ever seen.

surf, marry, kill...

(left to right)

CI single fin shaped by Al (ahem) Merrick, Allison GT Quad shaped by Will Allison, Bing bonzer shaped by Matt Calvani

...it is the year 2012 and civilization as we know it nears an abrupt ending. With home breaks being invaded by armed Chinese surfboards across the world, it has become a fight to save every last break on God's green Earth. The breakout of SurfWars(copyrighted!) has caused the military to ramp up it's super secret surf military division, the Tube Shooters. The U.S.S.A.'s (United Socialist States of America, founded 2008) military surf camps face a major surfboard shortage, and for the common good of the people everyone is forced to reduce their quiver to one board and donate the remainder to the troops. You're a stubborn, anti-war monger, dirty hippie and can't bear to know that some of your boards will be used in the bloodshed to follow.

You gaze at your 3-board quiver with a stiff upper lip, because its decision time, and you'll show these socialist bastards no emotion. Because tomorrow evening THEY will come for your surfboards. With a 4-6 foot swell beginning to fill in, its predicted to peak tomorrow morning, nicely groomed with offshore winds. Your options have come down to this: surf, marry, break.

The time of peace is waning and decisions must be made:

1. Choose 1 board to "surf" meaning you get to ride it 1 last time in perfect conditions in the morning, and then hand it off forever, but knowing it will remain in good hands.
   
2. Choose 1 board to "marry" which you will surf exclusively for the remainder of your journey on Earth, so make sure its versatile.
   
3. Finally, choose one surfboard that you will "kill" because you love it and don't want to see it used in fore coming bloodshed. You will have to insert this board into a wood chipper while being videotaped (for quality assurance purposes) and must watch a video loop of the tape for 5 minutes every morning for the rest of your life.

Your choices are above, so let's hear it...

reconnaissance...

...snooping around work sites is risky business according to the Hardy Boys books I read as a kid...

....you always stumble upon something you weren't supposed to and put yourself in danger...
...like this suspicious bulldozer and lighting equipment at the north end of the island...
...and this watchtower...I'm starting to feel a little uneasy... Maybe its a new prison for detainees of the "War on Error" or some other government surveillance project. But it's not what it looks like. It's just the Army Corps of Engineers getting ready to pump our tax dollars onto the beach so this knucklehead who wanted to build a house 10 yards off the ocean has an extra season to enjoy it. Whoo, what a relief. There's nothing wrong with that, right?

general survey...

...just curious. How much have you paid to surf since the meters have gone up and how many tickets have you gotten?

PADOW!!!

...so some kid takes a dump on your floor, and its stinking up the place. Your surf bros are on their way over to your pad to catch a pre-shred video sesh, and it smells like the campground scene from Blazing Saddles. Good thing you got Ted Shred's brotally awesome Original Surf Wax Candles to cover up that bogus biscuit. By the time your bros arrive they'll be like all "Bro, did you just wax your stick?" and you'll tweak your brow with a concerned look and be all like "Bro..." and he'll be all like "What?" and you'll be all like "PADOW! Ted Shred's on fire!!! and he''ll be like "Oh bro you didn't" but in fact, yes, you did. So then he's like "Bro, you got me good. Let's go shred the gnar." Little does he know your about to tweak his melon again with the Ted Shred auto air freshener...

Aloha Mr. Shred

oops! I crapped my pants...

...I know, it's gross. Everybody poops. After several "really good dogs" left turd nuggets in the shop, we thought we had ourselves covered in this area by not allowing pets in the store unless you can carry said pet. That way if the pet relieved itself most of it would be on the owner.

Then this happened. Some little kid decided to shake a trail of turds out of his cute little boardshorts while mom was shopping. (Happy Mother's Day!) The perp was apprehended and the mother voluntarily came back and cleaned up the nuggets. Good on ya!

The new shop policy requires kids under the age of 18 to either be diapered or carried by their parents. No exceptions.

Look for a full write up in the next lines.

have you been duped???

...here is a list (constantly being updated) of b-b-b-b-b-b-bad surfboards. These popouts are manufactured, not shaped, by people who don't surf. So now you know if your board was made in Thailand, China, Slovakia or Vietnam, instead of "Australia" like that shop told you...

this is important...

I waited a couple of days to post this so that you can also read a plethora of responses and comments. Now you get multiple points of view, if your open to that kind of thing...

Read this:

Gravy Train...

and then read this:

Kansas baby, Kansas...

Does your shaper surf???

...a few shots of Bing shaper Matt Calvani on his way to winning the Quiksilver Edition Vintage Longboard Contest at San-O. Kind of a small trophy but the smile on his face says it all," The real trophy is beating the guy with the sweet handle bar mustache."(Rubio?) Congratulations Matt and thanks for the beautiful 9'6" Silver Spoon with the extremely difficult resin work. It's been enjoyed by many.

Birthday girls...

*pic courtesy of www.follywaves.com*

...Happy Birthday ESA mom Nancy Hussey 5/8 (left) and Sarah Mitchell 5/7 (2nd from left). Hard to believe that these girls aren't sisters, but in fact mother and daughter! Good genes...
And yes that's Andre 3000 from Outkast. Hootie Hooooooooooo!

FOUND!!!

...this 5-8 year old golden retriever was found late last month and has been adopted by a gracious women. However, she knows this must belong to someone on the beach who misses it(?) very much. I remember seeing signs for a missing golden a couple weeks ago so if you know who it is call 556-8774.

intervention...

...do you know someone who needs help? For families and friends in crisis, we know that practically nothing can relieve the feelings of sadness and pain you are experiencing. While you may feel that all hope is lost, we offer our services not only because we want to help but because we know they work. Countless individuals and families have been saved from the depths of popout addiction and we hope that you find what you need here. We offer a hand-shaped, honest solution to crisis situations big and small. If someone you love has a problem with popouts, or you find yourself in crisis as a result of addiction, please contact us today.

just add gravy...

...the Biscuit has arrived: 5'6" x 20" x 2 3/4"

Could be the perfect board for these parts if you suffer from scoptologphobia: fear of your friends seeing you on a longboard.

Description reads "...for those OPEN to drawing new lines with the shortest rail possible..." however at the bottom of the label The Channel Islands Surfing Attorney General suggests ONLY riding this board in conditions under head-high! It's like giving a kid a book and telling him, "Read everything except the last three chapters." No exceptions and under penalty of being sent to China to work hard labor in the Anacrapa factory!

I christen thee Shmoo...

...ah the Shmoo.
The newest addition to my quiver (5'6" x 19 1/2" x 2 1/4") was shaped by Tom Neilson and glassed using the top secret Coil Construction. It has the weight of a bag of marshmallows and can take the abuse that dumpy beach break waves dish out. Handmade in the OO-S-A!